As parents, we’re not supposed to live our lives vicariously through our adult children. We’re advised to focus on living our own lives and following our own dreams.
But sometimes, I’ve decided it’s A-okay to savor life’s joys vicariously. Take this past Monday, for example. Our beautiful daughter-in-law, now in her mid-thirties, waited anxiously all day for the results of tests on the baby she’s expecting.
The call finally came in the late afternoon. The baby was developing just fine. There were no signs of any problems. Furthermore, they were having a girl, a baby sister for their three year old son.
When they called us that night, their excitement and happiness was palpable. And it was contagious! My husband and I couldn’t stop smiling long after we’d hung up the phone.
This is such an amazing time in a young couple’s life, and I admit it. I am loving every minute of living this stage of their lives vicariously! It’s their turn to experience the miracle of creating new life and growing their young family.
And truthfully, it brings back such wonderful memories. I was 37 when I became pregnant with our younger son. I’d had a miscarriage, and I was anxious about how this pregnancy would go. I can still remember calling my husband to tell him the news that the amniocentesis test revealed no problems with the baby’s development, and we were going to have a younger brother for our older son. We were both giddy, laughing and crying at once.
So, as long as I don’t turn into one of those obnoxious mother-in-law’s who tries to tell my adult children how to run their lives, I figure I have permission to enjoy their joy and happiness vicariously.
It’s the cycle of life, a blessing to savor.
I am so grateful.